Life is one big stress

I don't get it. Why must everything inevitably turn into stress ? Why can't we just life live the way it is and not have anything to worry? Wouldn't it be nice? Why why why?
Why can't converting driving license just be.....literally converting driving license? Why do i need to re-sit the freaking test? I can drive just fine.Just like any other idiot on the road. So whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? It's so painful and stressfull i think my hair is falling out more than usual. I'm Balding!
No thanks to stress. While we're at it, i wonder if i'll lose weight from this......at least there's a silver lining in my sky while i drown...

8:15am - It's a huge mistake. The smell of stress was ever so familiar. It was as though i had never left, had never gone on a 6 week vacation. You look "refresh" they say...."Yeah right", i thought " the smell of the office is quickly erasing all memories of my holiday, and true enough....i felt sick...sick to the stomach. There's something about that office that makes us all sick. Perhaps it's the bad ventilation; some blame it on the indecisive air cond....while me, I blame it all on the freaking IT Geeks who have never practice or heard of the term HYGIENE. They spread cooties, i swear.

5:15pm - i lost count of the times i wished that i had never step back into the office. What a crappy day! But really, it is quite predictable. Why did i ever think that i will ease back into my job for the next two months when the shit has been hitting the fan for the past 8 months now?
Trust a crisis to arise with a supplier barely an hour of settling down. Infact, trust a crisis to arise when i have yet to have my coffee!!

I spent the next hour and a bit at the gym after work. Pushing myself to work out, to work all the demons out of my head. Perhaps, as they all say, releasing some endorphins will help me calm down....regroup my thoughts and figure out a plan of action....Yeah right. More like, work myself out untill i have no energy to think or feel any emotion.....

I dread tomorrow. 4 more days till the weekend, 6 weeks till the next long weekend and 11 weeks untill Easter. Let the countdown begin....

After a long absence.....

Hello 2006!

Realised that i'm a month and a bit late with that greeting above... Oh well, better late than never?

I don't have much excuse to offer for my long long absence except that work engulfed me the second half of 2005. For those who thinks that we Aussies don't work hard as compared to Asian countries, i'd challenge you to swap places with me! No kidding. I've lost count of the times I was burnt out in 2005. Yeh yeah...whinge whinge f%cking whinge. I probably should be thankful to be working in Canberra...

Anyhow, i'm back in the bush capital after spending 6 blissful weeks in Malaysia; spoilt rotten by families and friends. All ready to jump back in the ratrace....*gulp*

*In actual fact, i'm wide awake at approximately 10:30pm on a Sunday night dreading my first day back to work tomorrow...Oh Help me God!

Every so often the tears flow so freely

You would think that after 10 months the pain would ease, the pain would subside but truly, it never does. Sure, there are times where I’m living my life, enjoying my world but just when this happens it sneaks up on me. This dark sorrow creeps up with overwhelming and suffocating grief.

I miss you.

The weather has been playing havoc recently. Just a month ago, it was snowing and hailing, two weeks ago there was an awful cold snap and now……
Bright Blue sky! I love how we HAD to endure 4-5 months of cold cold weather to suddenly have a peek of whats in store for the next few months.

I’ve come to the point where I just ain’t enjoying them anymore. People talk about how common binge drinking is; how about binge smoking? I think personally, I have been binge smoking for the last 2-3 years. Started out with the excuse of social smoking to coping with difficult times to being addicted to nicotine…I have simply become one who smokes. A chain smoker. There, I have said it. Gone where the days where I would sit and enjoy a couple of smokes while having a drink and a chat with friends. I’m not as bad any some who goes by pack a day but I think 25 sticks in 7 days is bad enough……So I’m taking a break. Who knows, I might probably quit for good….I would ideally, like to go back to the days where I only smoke to kick back and relax….

Update: Day 3:- Just had my first coffee session without any. I was nervous but proud that I lived through it. Next test? Sat’s drinking session. Now…THAT’S a test.

3 years ago…
Living on ressies
Having the time of my life
I have just gotten together with Twitchy
G block was the place to be…
Tobogganing at the snow
When weekends were just another day to party to compliment existing Thursday and Friday nights…

2 years ago...
Living in a waterside 3 bedroom apartment along with two other girl friends
Picking up the pieces after an exodus of friends
Dreading the end of Uni
All about the cooking and eating
Retreated to a social seclusion
Horse Riding

1 year ago…
One bedroom near city apartment
Working 25 hours per week
Getting out of debt – barely living by
Mad house-drinking parties
Mourning over the end of my university chapter

Today...
Living with his parents along with the two dogs
Owning a Bright bumblebee
Working fulltime in a Marketing Coordinator position
Learning to ski
Learning to drive
I had lost a brother...

Hire Slow, Sack fast?

That was quoted on the first page of the Business pullout a week ago. That was surely, I thought, the most inappropriate thing for an employer to say. Arrogant yes, In denial Yes. Openly taunting and asking for a PR disaster…HELL YES! And even more so to have those words coming from someone i know is enough to make me cringe….

I have recently seen a side of management which deeply disturbs me. Having work in this company for the past 18 months, I’ve grown to love every single one of my weird and eccentric workmates. This month, I’m losing four of them. It’s quite an eye opener, I’ll have to say. Again, full of uncertainty…I can’t help but wonder, is a line between personal, business and social in office relationships? Am I naïve to think that people can change if they were given another chance?

I sure am glad I’m not in Management…..

Look at what i did at work today....

Here I am, once again....

Here I go again jumping into the blogging bandwagon....