Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Much better

Yesterday I've never felt so low ( except for the first few days of baby's life in the hospital), helpless and hopeless. It's a bad low moment in my life.

Today I woke up with a sense of determination. I was determined to not let myself feel that way. To stop crying and do something to lift myself up. So I got twitchy to wake me up early in the morning, and I quickly showered and clean myself before caring for baby. It worked.

It was a much more better day. Baby slept, I was calmer.....even had a nap together at midday. But come late afternoon, I suddenly feel suffocated. Suddenly all I can think about is how I have nothing much to look forward to. Every night and every day is the same..... So I decided to immediately get out  of the house and walk up the block. Glad I did...felt a little better.

People say this gets easier. I sure hope so.

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